Let me say that I am a pensive and introspective person. An idea person, I love the idea or thought of things which leads to kind of fumble in the practicality of them or dismiss them (remember EoM?). Anyway, this tendency toward contemplation has been drawing my attention toward some trends going on society…..and not in good way. No, its not the economy everyone can see that, it the societal, psychological, behavioral…uh…o.k. I’m not a psych major but hopefully you can see what I’m getting at….its the direction of the new age macroscopic mentality trends I’ve picking up on that’s catching my attention. I see good things but as with everything in life, there is some bad. This could just be things that only I am seeing but I feel the need to speak on it. For now, I’ll just talk about two things I’m seeing: pride[hubris?] and sheepishness#letsbegin.


So now it’s mode to do-away with or flip off authority in this age of easily-stifled-self-expression. I don’t if its the water or what but more and more people are running with encouragement and turning into gas for their self-proclaimed godhead. People can hold whatever beliefs they want, doesn’t really matter since everyone believes in something and holds faith. The thing I’m seeing that doesn’t sit well with is people doing away with God/authority only to put themselves there instead. A philosopher (I forget his name) predicted this as the next logical step. People would tire of any censorship of their behavior and so they would phase out any institutions or organizations that would do so. And in that empty space, people will assert themselves. I see the evidence for this in the way people refer to themselves, music, art, etc. In my eyes there’s a difference between being confident in your abilities and a flesh-and-blood human being, not remarkably unlike other flesh-and-blood human beings, believing themselves to be god#really?


It’s funny how in a time when people would believe themselves to be gods that would literary millions of people willing kiss their ass and agree. I’m starting to believe that I belong to the last sensible generation because the ones after mine (The Millennials) are warped. They’re young and wanna be free from the tyranny stifled self-expression and judgment. Basically they want to do whatever they want with no criticism-_-#imaginary#howwegetinourownway. They’re living in this imaginary world where they think freedom is actually free.Their, and my own,generation is hypersensitive to others opinions so far as to declare war for not agreeing. When did we get here? To place where a difference of opinion is infringing on someone’s “freedom”?#gangmentality. People have grown to be more and more sheepish these days. Following the wagon because everyone else is and you had better agree with it. We (I do not literary mean everyone this is just for convenience) have  gotten real easy to impress as well. Don’t believe me? Just take a look at all the celebrities and you tell me how many are actually worth celebrating#I’llwait.

There other things that raise a brow but they’re more political besides the behavioral/psychological trends will outlast the latest political agenda. As someone who wants to have kids someday these are ones that matter#OURFUTURE.


Fifty Shades of Grey

No, I have not read it but I have heard the buzz about everywhere from overhearing random gossip between the chicks on the other aisle to LinkedIn. All this makes me want to read it. My sister was telling how a friend had the book, couldn’t stop talking about it and would be willing to let her borrow and read it. Because I’m a faster and more obsessive reader than her, I’ll be reading first. I heard ABOUT the book long before I heard the BUZZ. I have recently got the buzz on LinkedIn and (like the adventurer I am) followed it to wherever it took me#wildwomendo.

So this book has a little upset over it. Whether it’s success heralds a hallmark in literary canon or mommy porn, and its place in the Feminist lense: a subverting setback or progressive step forward? Without actually reading the book, just going on the synopsis I found at Wikipedia, I want to speak a little on those two topics. But before we get there, let’s get into what I (tentatively) know about the novel:

1. It emerged from a fan fiction piece about….Twilight?#really?

2. It involves S&M or BDSM.

3. Beat out Harry Potter in bestselling UK novel.


1. It emerged from a fan fiction piece about Twilight?#really,really?#WeAreNoLongerInForks.

LOL, okay. I got a few more details but nothing to significantly spoil the reading for my self or anyone else. So we can move on#buzz.

Literary Masterpiece or Commercial Success?

It’s content, readership and beginnings leaves room for question about “Shades” (short) literary standing. Some have called nothing but porn: mommy or poorly written porn on top of that. When I read the synopsis of the story, the first thing I honestly thought of was the film “Secretary” with James Spader and Jake Gyllenhall’s sister. Having half watched that film (which was uncomfortable) and after multiple viewings I got the message and developed an appreciation for it. It brought new perspective on what was previously taboo and it is praised as a wonderful and genuine piece of modern film. So why can’t this novel do the same? Sex, the forbidden, relationship dynamics, self-discovery sound like tags for this novel so I don’t see why this couldn’t be literary masterpiece(I haven’t read it). I am inclined to say don’t let the driving motifs(this case, S&M) of a story blind one from the story itself#truthisstrangerthanfiction.          BUT since it did emerge from a Twilight fan fiction(#really, really?) I’m going to side with commercial success. Sorry, I can’t see anything to do with Twilight being a literary hallmark. A way to make good money? Yes. Afterall, if you can sell tweens and grown women their tweenish fantasies, who says you can’t raise the content rating and sell soccer mom’s theirs too?#makingmoney#nothingwrongwiththat.

Feminist Subversion or Feminist Desideratum?

There has also been debate amongst the critics of the socio-political persuasion. I am referencing the Feminists and the Anti-Feminists that would like use “Shades” as an illustrative point in their arguments. It will be used, regardless of what I have to say, but I feel that it would be ineffective tool since it’s so pliable to either agenda. But before I go on a couple of disclaimers need to be issued:

The author supports Feminism and identifies as a Feminist.

The author has yet to engage in any intimate relationship or sexual activity. Thank you. 

Now, being an avid lover of Feminism (there’s nothing I love more than woman going for hers#bitchskillingit#the Queen Bee), I don’t see how this novel subverts the principles of Feminism. It’s been called “trite”, “typical”, “cliche” for its ingenue-corrupted-by-vampire like premise. But if a woman is pursuing her fantasies in her sexuality, is she not enjoying her liberty? Even if that fantasy is one of powerlessness and domination it’s hers to have right? The goal was to fight for a woman’s right to choose what she wants in life. If she chooses a life of submissiveness then shouldn’t her choice be upheld as well? Now the counterargument is that novel reflects some deep psychological trait in women. While women may want power, but the truth maybe that we actually aren’t comfortable with all the responsibilities and nuances of power or we fumble with it trying to have best of both worlds. That’s only half true, a woman can handle all the responsibility just as well if that’s what she wants. I also don’t believe that a woman taking on a submissive role in sex or a relationship is an unveiling that woman are and were always meant to be so. It’s her choice. Choosing to submit to someone is different from being expected or forced to submit to someone. Even the very act of buying and reading pornographic material (like this book for example)  is considered a progressive step in feminism, so why judge a woman on the particulars of her sexuality? I personally think that this book (or more like what I know of it so far) may be the embodiment of what feminism fight for: a young educated woman uses her liberty to pursue her happiness. It shouldn’t matter how that happiness takes shape#whathappinessis.

BUT given that it was spawned out of Twilight this novel is likely just as agnsty and self-indulgent, like a Twilight for Adults; Twilight rated R. I just can’t take it that seriously#really, really?.


For Whom the Bell Tolls

So I continue to commit to my blog weekly initiative by returning on my day of rest to to share some thoughts#commitment. The first is personal about a significant time coming up for me hence the topic title#thebelltolls.

If you are unemployed, like myself, you pay attention to the applications you apply for and dispair. Lately I have been noticing a new trend. Either well below the rest of the application or in the fine print, the following  disclaimers are going mode in the application process:

Local Applicants Only 

Please Do Not Apply if Uunemployed for a Year


I feel like Quasimodo. The first seemed a purposeful thwart to my tactic of applying across the country. I decided to follow my father’s and friend’s advice to follow the work. There is very little here where I live but I hear Chicago is looking for people. Yeah, they’re looking for Chicago natives-_-. Whatever do it any way, never know I might luck up#wishfulthinking. It was the second disclaimer that warranted a really? Like really? Yeah really. I don’t know the economical big picture (shame on me) but to me this was a giant red flag of times to come. Especially since yours truly gets to celebrate her official 7 month of unemployment today*rolls eyes*.

So now it’s a la mode for companies to blacklist applicants if they have been unemployed for a year or more? My DES has gone from mild to acute.  Of course this new fashion statement is justified with “deterioration of skills” and “alienation from office environment causes a loss of proper etiquette” excuses, but really? It’s not enough that entry-level positions demand 2-3 years of experience, or that advanced degrees compete with bachelor degrees for the same barely-above minimum wage entry-level position. No, today’s talent doesn’t have enough hoops to jump through in this job market, let’s add another and let’s make it big. I can’t be the only one that sees a counterproductive cycle in the job market can I? In a time of terms like “experience”, “relevant industry experience”,”poor economy”, “job shortage”, “education”,  “branding”  and “relative skill set” are we really going to cut off talent this way? Half those terms are supposed to be criterion to finding the right candidate but coupled with the others it serves more and more to cut the pool down to those ALREADY employed and freshly graduated, cycling out the job hunters to the permanently unemployable because they were unemployed.

The obvious solution is to go back to school and “ride” the recession out so to speak. That option is just as undesirable as my present circumstances, though I am exploring it. But really, what person who has already accumulated a mountain of debt for their first education wants to go further into debt for a second one? My debt is very small compared to some of my peers, but it’s still money I can’t pay back.

So can you see why I can hear the bells? In five months I’ll be blacklisted from higher-paying (and many other) employment opportunities for being unemployed (despite a very active search). So now the forseeable goal is to enroll for the spring and continue the hunt.

In five months, I’ll no longer be suffering from DES, I will have contracted UD (Unemployable Disease) if I don’t get a job by then.